Monday, March 15, 2010

So let it be written...

I think I may be omniscient.

Either that, or the spell check on my computer is on the blink.


Let's run with the first idea.

It seems, lately, that evrything I spel is korect. Thare are no underlines, no blincks, no phlashes, nuthing to say that I am dooing it rong. I kan ohnly kunklood that I hav krost the threshold intwo perphecshun. I kan, literraly doo no rong -- att leist gramatically speeking. This is heddy stuph.

Gnot ohnly doo I spel evrytheeng korektly, buht I kan ahlso maek up gnew werds: phour instunce ihf I wonted to deeskrybe thuh daye as longandtiring, or sunshineiful -- akordeeng to my kumpewtor -- I hav just yoused lajitamut woords.

Wut two dooo wyth such powher iz a wreal skullyscratcher. Shood I yooose my powerz four thuh goud of mankinde or shud I selphishlee exployt themm fore gane?


Iz it troo what Spydermaan'z unkel sed, that wyth graet powher kums graate responsibylluhty, ohr doo I ohnly hav an oblugayshun too my ohwn persunul joyishness and satisfiednessesses? I dohnt no.

Ahl I dooo gno iz that thear wuz gnot wun misspelt werrd ihn that entyer idiotical pohst.


Eyem gnot shur ihf perhpecshuun iz ahwl itz krakt uhp tou bei. Frainklee, I theink mye spelchek just gawt tyred uv beeyng thuh lassed wun ihn Umarika hoo steel kairs uhbowt proppehr werd usageination.

Helllp me pleez.

(Kan yew tell itz sleepifyingly lait, and Eyve bin uhp four comatosifyingly tou long?)

16 comments:

Pam Emmons said...

My favorite word is usageination. I'm going to use that from now on.

You know, you should move to Wisconsin. They always make up new words there.

Oh, and I laughed my butt off. Thankyouverymuch.

WackyMummy said...

This post gave me no end of satisfiednesses too, as I'm a great appreciator of perfection, no matter how you spell it.

Thanks for the giggle. =)

Aaron said...

You hurt my brain.....

Krystyn said...

I think I've gone cross-eyed! I can't believe you kept it up the whole time!

Tracie said...

Love this! .......when my spell check goes out, my typing looks pretty much like this in fact, so I was able to easily understand everything you wrote.

Hmmmmmm maybe I should look into some tutoring.

kaye said...

get some sleep--don't you just hate the time change? It's weird but I could read everything you wrote . . .

lady macleod said...

Ow! My head hurts! You are in excellent company as the old Bard himself made up many of his words that are now considered 'prose'.

Spot On Your Pants said...

Ha ha. I was just agonizing over sounding like a total grammar idiot in another comment. Perfect transition to your post. :-) I have this really bizarre cousin (you know, like his last wedding was at the Renaissance Fair in a Yurt)who decided to never use the letter "S". He'll use Z if it's absolutely necessary. But no S. Never. :-)

Momisodes said...

Yoewza. That was fun to read through :)

Sheri Stewart said...

You cracked me the heck up, dude! You are so creative! And....is there spell check for blogger?! Because if there is, mine's broken.

Kelly Deneen said...

Nothing like a good blog post all in phonetics. :)

CaJoh said...

I'm curious if you misspelled all of the words on purpose to make your spell checker feel more loved. You're so thoughtful.

Thanks for the grin,

Kat said...

You should have a warning label at the beginning of this post for all dyslexics. I looked at it and said, "HUH??" ;)

Pam Emmons- What's dat you say der about Wisconsinites, ya hey?

Honey Mommy said...

I'm with Aaron. You totally hurt my brain just reading that! I can't imagine actually writing it.

Carol said...

What did you say!!!

Emmy said...

Lol! Awesome. In Firefox it underlines words if they are spelled wrong, but it seems to be missing some all of the sudden too, so now I have to spell check and look for the little red lines.. dang!