Friday, January 23, 2009

I don't know what to do

Four words can change your life.

She is sitting there, having just been brought back into the room, after the procedure. Nurses are poking and adjusting and monitoring. She looks at me and whispers "They think it's Lymphoma."

How do I put on a brave face? I didn't expect that. I didn't even know it was a consideration.

My wife went to the hospital today with fatigue and shortness of breath and stomach pain. After many hours, she finally had the endoscopy. What we expected was some kind of intestinal bleeding -- an ulcer. Instead the doctor came back with a picture of a fist size mass attached to the lining of her stomach. He thinks it's Lymphoma. We'll know by Wednesday, when the biopsy results are in.

I've been trying to learn something, anything I can. I can't figure any of this out.

One word changes so much.

I don't know what to do.

21 comments:

Gina said...

I'm praying for you and your wife, Chris.

Terri said...

Chris, you put one foot in front of the other -- and pray. I'll be praying with you.

The Rambler said...

Chris. I'm so sorry. Be strong for her. And your kids. Hold her hand, squeeze it tight and let her know your there and you'll get through this together.

I know I've only come to your site twice before but I wanted to leave something today because I'm sure you need the support.

Hang in there and will keep you both in my thoughts.

Kimber said...

OMG Chris, I'm so sorry to hear of this. You'll definitely be in my thoughts and prayers.

Alexandria said...

Oh my goodness. Chris *hugs* I am sending out prayers as I type this out. I cannot begin to imagine what is running through your minds. I hope all turns out well. I'm so sorry you're wife and your family is having to go through this.

Wifey Dessert said...

oh my goodness! I am so sorry I'm praying for you and your wife

stefanie said...

I am praying for you all.

Lean on God. I mean hard. Let Him carry you.

Here's what it says in The Message, a paraphrase, from Philippians 4:6-9

6-7Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

8-9Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.

SalGal said...

Lymphoma is what my dad had. But that was 25 years ago.

Lymphoma is what our best friend had 10 years ago, but he is with us and well today.

You guys will come through this battle-scarred, but stronger than ever. You're in our prayers!

Diane said...

I'm so sorry to hear this. My thoughts will be with you and your family. Stay tough and just let her know how much she means to you. that will help her more than any medical treatment there is available.
{hugs}

CaJoh said...

So sorry to hear this. Be strong. Hope the results turn out well.

Prayers for you and your wife,

Izzy 'N Emmy said...

Thinking of you and your family.

*HUGS*

Tabitha Chooses Bliss said...

I am praying and believing that you guys will make it through this. I STRONGLY believe this, so you do to.

Sue said...

Chris, first - BREATHE - I know that you're all holding your breath just waiting for Wednesday to get here. Second - pray - we will be praying with you. We're praying for a positive outcome.

And then - you just take it one minute, one hour, one day at a time.

Belle (from Life of a...) said...

Oh Chris...know that all of us who read your blog are thinking of you and your family and offering up petitions for grace and mercy and comfort.

Pam Emmons said...

Pete and I are walking around a little dazed today, praying for the best, but making plans for me to come out if needed. We'll talk tonight.

BTW, Sue that left the message is my mom. SHe said to PLEASE call her if you need to.

Cecily R said...

Chris, I'm so sorry. I wish I knew better what to say, I really do. I'll be thinking and praying for your family.

imbeingheldhostage said...

You tell us and we start praying like crazy. I'm so sorry, but I disagree with being strong. Don't be too strong. I would be angry at my husband and think he wasn't taking things seriously if he was putting on a brave face. PLUS, I tend to go into soldier mode if I think my husband is wavering even the slightest and I would fight harder to stay positive. Be there. Love her. We'll be here for you.

Aaron said...

....You know me.

...whatever you need.

I will pray, but as Father Mulcahy says "That's all I ever get to do...."

You know where I stand and where I will stand if needed.

KatieZ said...

Oh Chris, my heart is bleeding for you and your wife and your family at this time. You will all be in my prayers! If there is anything that us long distance bloggy friends can do for you, you definitely have my support. Just let us know!

echoeve said...

I am so sorry. I really hope everything is okay. I know we don't really know each other, but I feel like I know so much about you after reading so much of your blog. You have a wonderful family, and I am so sorry.

Straight to Your Hart said...

Prayers, love, hugs, and peace I ask for you and your family. God be with you...