Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek
"Well," I replied, sheepishly "I'm...uh...taking pictures of my pants."
I love cargo shorts. I have several pair, from Old Navy (the most comfortable) in various shades of khaki. In the summer time, that's all I wear.
Okay, it's not all I wear, but you get the point. I can always tell when the seasons are changing, because my shorts start to fray, and wear a little thin (well, I can tell the seasons are changing in the other ways too). They're size 34 these days. That's a little disturbing.
I've always maintained that boys carry everything they need to survive, in their pockets. And with cargo shorts, I have two additional, and very big, pockets, in which to carry more of the stuff that I can't possibly live without. But here's the problem: I also carry a LOT of other stuff too. See, I'm a note writer -- I constantly scribble notes to myself, intending to get back to them, but more often than not, I don't. But somewhere, back in the deep, dusty, cobwebs of my mind, I believe that what I have written down is important, yet when it comes time to transfer the contents of my pockets to the next pair of shorts, I'm usually trying to get out the door in the morning and, well, you probably see where this is going...
So, anyway, I had a little time this morning, so I thought I'd clean out my pockets...Here's what I found:
Right Front Pocket: Key ring (with 16 keys -- I think I need a second key ring) Pen (my Parker Jotter -- essential for writing notes to self, I've carried some version of this pen since I was nineteen. I take it everywhere. Almost everywhere). Generic package of two Ibuprofen tablets, from the medicine cabinet in my office. I had a headache a couple of weeks ago.
Right Side Pocket: Knife. Made by Gerber (the knife company, not the baby food company), half straight, half serrated edge, 440 steel, 4 inch blade. If you carry a knife, you will find a use for it everyday. And most of those reasons don't involve hurting your co-workers. Most of them. Ipod Nano. 4 gigabytes of books on CD.
Back Right Pocket: Wallet. Contains driver's license, which apparently expires this month -- good to know -- debit card, library cards, from 6 different library systems (I'm such a rebel). And, astonishingly, 75 dollars in cash, from a photo shoot over the weekend. I forgot all about it, there's so rarely anything in there. I wonder how long it would have stayed there?
Back Left Pocket: One, used, toilet paper tube. Sometimes, you write notes to yourself on whatever is handy. This one says "Leg lamp, ink, dvd, shoelaces." I have no idea how old this is.
Front Left Pocket: One rumpled dollar bill. Two Jolley Ranchers -- peach smoothie and orange smoothie. Five Stride Spearmint gum wrappers. Cell phone -- I hate my cell phone, but I'm eligible for an upgrade this month! Two quarters (wow! where did all this money come from?) -- an Ohio and a Virginia. And three notes to self: 1. Parmesan, Butter, AJ (apple juice) - a grocery list from last week. Glad I kept that. 2. Ink for pen, notebook (go figure), novel, fall leaves, Revolutionary War, ghosts, something illegible. 3. A list of future blog post ideas - it's a surprise!
and finally, Left Side Pocket: To go menu from Chili's (I got a craving last Saturday night), One more note to self, this one written on a napkin from Jamba Juice -- Violin, ink (I go through a lot of ink, writing all these notes), pigs, tacos, prescriptions, gas, bank, ice cream cake. One mysterious little scrap of paper, that just says unicycle. What the...?
Full pack of Stride Spearmint gum. This is the gum I endorse. My dentist/brother-in-law says that the ingredient zylotol promotes healthier teeth. That's why I chew it. That, and the fact that you can blow bubbles with it, even though it isn't "bubble gum." Carmex -- my lips were chappy -- in August. And last but not least, my flashlight. My boss makes me work in the dark, so it's three LED's come in handy. And it also comes equipped with a red laser light, useful for pointing at co-workers, from afar, causing them to think that they are being targeted by a sniper. We have a lot of those in the moving industry.
Am I the only one who does this?
This is why I wear a belt.
That reminds me... I need some ink.
40 comments:
Dude. You ARE LIKE my husband. He's the same way. A place for everything im his (also size 34 I might) cargo shorts which are also frayed.
And is that an iPod Nano? Check.
I must say your exposure here is spot on.
Let's hope your boss appreciates your perfect/decent exposure. :)
You need to write a book! I would NEVER have thought a pair of someone else's cargo shorts could be so dang interesting!!!!
Your photography ~ even a humble subject like SHORTS! ~ is gripping, your storytelling is phenomenal... I'm telling you, WRITE A BOOK! I WILL buy it. (so you know you've got at least one sold already!)
This post made me laugh! Your boss catching you taking these pics, too funny! I believe cargo pants were made for men just like you!!
BTW- my hubby just now (we've been married for 12 years and the past 10 he's been in 36)got back into 34's and is thrilled!!!
Ummm...yes. lol. Great post. Very creative. You are a great writer.
You are such a junk-junkie.
Hey, I read the 2006 copy of the Yule Log, when you suggested we stop naming all the grandkids with "A" and "J" names, and you suggested someone use a "C" name. I followed directions well, don't I?
I agree with Valleygirl...write a "sweet-awesome" book. About nothing. Like Seinfeld.
Awesome shots!
I think you just might have more in your pockets than I do in my purse.
My hubby is nuts about cargo shorts too. I think I'll start checking his pockets.
that was really funny!
What do you wear when it is cool or cold outdoors? same version, longer legs?
Perhaps you need to invest in a backpack or man-purse???(smiles)
Do you know how long it took me to realize that Jon was a cargo keeper too? Man, a lot of crap went through our washer...(I am SO lame when it comes to laundry)
And Jon's waist? Hasn't been a 34 since he was 18. I'm just sayin'.
Wow, I could totally fill my purse with all of that...thank goodness for cargo shorts or you'd be carrying a murse ;)
I try to put the least amount in my pockets as possible...because when I go to the Doc..I get weighed!! Problem is she/he asks me to remove all non-essential items and when I tell them I already did...OOps...Find a Happy place!!!LOL..
My hubby likes cargo shorts and pants as well for the same reasons...
OK, so 3 things. What did your boss say to your response of taking pictures? I can't quit laughing just thinking about it, I am sure I can imagine the look on his face now. 2nd Interesting topic but I am curious if you were wearing these pants how did you get the picture of the size tag the way you did? 3rd with all of your blog followers are you convinced to do more with your talents? OK 4 ... Good choice in gum. it's my favorite. Well 2nd favorite i still maintain you don't get better than grape bubble gum.
My husband also likes those cargo shorts and for the same reasons. All of them. He loves to have places to put his little treasures. This post is really putting yourself out there!! Impressive. Also shows you are a planner, list maker, have a be prepared motto going on and you are an ultimate blogger taking your blog pictures at work!! That is courage and I hope your boss appreciates all of your qualities!!
Great creative post!
Holy smokes....if you were a woman your purse would be like the black hole! Big score on the $75.50. I would have been ecstatic.
That rocked! I am wondering how often you wash those things!
Happy PSF!
Dude, you carry almost as much in your pocket as I do in my purse. I'm pretty sure I win, but you come in a close second my friend!
That is the most impressive pocket cleaning adventure ever.
By the way, my official Photo-Story Friday is finally up!
I love this post... it revealed so much about who you are... great capture of a slice of life through the cargo pants view finder!!
Who knew?
Ok, that's it. This isn't really some guy named Chris who's living in my birthplace stomping grounds, is it?! This is my hubby. I know that because of the cargo shorts stuffed to the brim with things only a grandma would carry in her handbag-- only, you forgot to photograph the over-stuffed wallet that makes your rearend look ten pounds heavier than it really is. Size 34 clinches it. I'm on to you...
I'm not sure how you did it, but I actually read the entire post--about your cargo shorts!
You are the man version of me, except for pockets I have a purse, and the size 34 is --YEAH RIGHT! Like I'll tell after giving birth!
Anyway, DUDE! You are some kind of writer for keeping this so interesting.
Question, no songs on the IPOD, just books?
Excellent post/photos. Kept me chuckling the whole way through.
Kind of sounds like the randomness that is my purse. You never know what will pop out of there!
Yeah, I'm copying you, deal with it punk. Isn't the best form of flattery is when someone tries to copy you....sheesh.
I love the shorts. I have 5 pair. One I have had for 6 years....they are green and falling apart, but they are my "I'm going to do yardwork" shorts.
One other question......what were you wearing while you taking the pictures?
......don't answer that.
I think you need a manpurse! You carry more stuff than I do...LOL.
Love the shots though. Who knew shorts could be so fun?
Thanks for visiting my story!
What a great gift you have for story telling..
I love this post. I love the randomness of your notes. Especially "unicycle". Who has a note saying "unicycle". haha Who thought that a pair of shorts could have so much to say about you.
I do that....with the notes. Not so much the other stuff. Well, in my purse, not so much my pockets. My purse is my catch all.
Happy PSF!
Oh my goodness this was a funny post/ fotostory friday! I think ALL guys have to have half a dozen things in each pocket! My nephew used to carry about 50 pen and pencils in one pocket! Troy has gotten out of the habit of packing his pockets since he works in a prison and can't bring ANYTHING in with him! But I remember very well washing things life knives, papers, and wallets, cause I don't check pockets!
Wow, you have more things in your pants then I have in my purse! I love how you explained everything, you had me laughin the whole time!
Leg lamp? As in "FRAGILE, that must be Italian" and Major Award? I have a sudden urge for the snowy midwestern streets of my childhood and a bb gun on Christmas morning.
Or maybe I'll check my husbands pockets for money.
Those were great photos of your cargo shorts and I loved hearing and seeing all that you put in all those pockets! My husband is in a 34 these days too - I think that is the PERFECT size for men - so there!
Take care and have a good weekend - Kellan
Wowsers you fit quite a bit in them pants. I write lists all the time and never use them.
Chris, if you need me to for the winter months, I can send you some of my ACU (digital camo) pants that I wear daily. Not only do I have the front two and back two pockets, along with the cargo side pockets, but they also have some cargo pockets on the outside LOWER LEGS TOO!!!! In addition, there are pouches where over the knees where you can slide in some knee pads. This may come in handy when you have to kneel for hours, pearched, waiting to snipe off your co-workers with that lazer of yours WHAT A DREAM!! there are strings inside the waist so if you forget your belt, you can tie them up and protect yourself from being mistaken for a camelon plumber. And, if you wear the top too, you have two breast pockets, 3 perfect pen holders on the left arm, and one shoulder pocket on each arm. And don't even get me started with all the velcro all over the top/shirt...the posibilities are endless. Don't forget the pouches available for elbow pads too. You'd be the talk of the moving industry! Holler if you need some, I'll send you the homosexual looking black berret I have to wear too. That should lessen the jealousy of the way you look.
Pete
Wow. YOu pack around more in your cargo's than I carry in my purse. No wonder you need a belt. :)
Still shaking my head in wonder that you can even sit down with all that stowed away.
Great presentation!
I could not believe that you had all of that in your shorts. My husband wears cargo shorts, but I think about the most he ever has in there is some change or maybe some receipts. I take that back he has his I-phone and wallet too.
Loved the pictures in this post. So simple and yet artistic.
I carry tons of things in my pockets too because far too often I leave my purse at home or in the car and well, my pockets stay with my person all day. Winter is the best cuz then I have more pockets. :) Now my son and husband love the cargos!
Hey Chris..I was tagged and now you are! You are too funny not to have at least 7 random quirky things to share about yourself! The cargo pants "load" does not count. See my site for details!
Seriously...that is more stuff than I have in my purse.
You should have taken a picture of the bosses face as he caught you taking these pants pictures.
Great post! You caught the little details that are often left out but need remembering.
Riiiight. SO you're a man. Why should you be any different from any other man I know? Maybe you carry a little more luggage that the men I know... seriously, a toilet roll? Well, at least you are very well prepared for almost any eventuality. Unless it requires ink off course...
Um, it's official. You officially carry more in your POCKETS than I do in my mammouth-sized purse. Wow. If my hubby carried all that, I'm pretty sure he'd forget about it all, and it would all end up in the wash...
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