Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Letting others think for you...

I committed myself to blogging for the entire month of June, and after five days I've run out of topics. So, I turned -- where else? -- to a random blog topic generator.

Did you know there was such a thing as a random blog topic generator?

I didn't either, but I thought what the heck, maybe I'll let this RBTG give me five topics to write about tonight. Here they are, just as they generated:

1. Getting your license

I assume this means your driver's license -- which is the only license I have anyway. This took me back twenty four years, to the time of Driver's Ed. You remember Driver's Ed -- the class taught by the basketball coach? The class with the simulators and the gory movies with the great titles (Highways of Agony, Wheels of Tragedy, Mechanized Death...).

When I was sixteen, sixteen seemed like a perfectly reasonable age to allow responsible young men and women to take four thousand pound death machines on to the highways and byways of America.

(When I was sixteen, I also once ate a whole bottle of jalapeno peppers to impress a girl -- she was impressed with how much time I spent in the bathroom that night)

My first day in Driver's Ed, the Coach decided to take three of us out driving in the School's Ford Pinto (talk about mechanized death).

On the highway.

And I was first.

 I had never done more than back our family car out of the garage, but the coach coaxed me out on to the highway east of Skyline High School, in Salt Lake, pointed me up Parley's Canyon, and promptly fell asleep.

I've since decided that the only way to survive as a Driver's Ed instructor, would be to be heavily addicted to muscle relaxants.

I drove twenty miles, to the Park City Ski Resort, before he woke up.

That went a little long -- I'll breeze through the last four:

2. Analog Synthesizers

We also call these pianos.

3. Things that you think you should not be subject to

Here's my top 5:

-- Gravity
-- Inertia
-- Primogeniture
-- Alien Abduction/Anal probing/ Men in Black Flashy Thing
-- Ear Hair

4. Cutting People in Line

That's really what it said.

I assume it was supposed to say People Who Cut in Line.

I can't really argue both sides here, as a rule I'm generally opposed to people who cut in line, but not nearly as opposed as I am to cutting people in line. I stand in lines sometimes, and I don't want to have to cut anyone, and I REALLY don't want to be cut myself. Is this a fad? Have I missed something?

5. Eukaryotic Organisms

This was going to be a much more interesting topic until I realized I had misread BOTH words.

(Incidentally, a Eukaryotic Organism is an organism whose cells contain complex structures, enclosed within membranes. YOU are a Eukaryotic Organism. Well, most of you.)

Tomorrow night: Photostory Friday (yes, on Thursday. Get over it.)


Emmy said...

I misread the last one too. And what a scary drivers Ed experience! Wow what was that teacher thinking?? Or well he obviously was not

Sheri said...

I also misread that last one and couldn't wait to hear what you said about it.

Blog about how to be an easygoing, happy, content parent instead of a frazzled, freaked out, mess of a mom to three kids. please.

kayerj said...

#5 :D